lyhyehkössä parisuhteessani oon huomannut, että parisuhteessa olo on vähän niinkuin olisi ulkomailla. ulkomailla ollessa kun oppii paitsi uudesta kulttuurista myös omastaan ihan eri tavalla kuin kotimaassa. sitä tulee kiinnittäneeksi ihan eri asioihin huomiota. samalla tavalla mä oon oppinut itsestäni ihan uusia asioita parisuhteessa. itse asiassa munhan pitäisi oppia kaksinkerroin, sillä oonhan mä sekä parisuhteessa että ulkomailla.
heti aluksi huomasin tuntevani itseni todella helposti poissuljetuks. mä haluan olla paikalla, kokea kaiken. tai sitten poissaolon täytyy olla mun oma päätös. sitten tietysti analysoin syitä ja seurauksia. muistan kerrankin, kun lapsena menin omilla synttärijuhlillani piiloon kavereita vain testatakseni, kuinka kauan niillä kestää huomata mun poissaoloni. kesti kauemmin kuin mitä mä jaksoin olla piilossa. tai siis kyllähän ne huomasi, etten ollut paikalla, olettivat mun menneen vessaan. uskoisin.
toinen lapsellinen piirre on, että haluan, mitä toisellakin on. ja mikä säälittävintä, tää koskee pääasiassa elintarvikkeita. jos harald ostaa itselleen karkkia, täytyy munkin saada omia karkkeja. ja jos se kehtaakin laittaa kokiksen ostoskärryihin mun huomaamatta...
lisäksi oon huomannu olevani todella huolissani. ennen naureskelin muille, nyt en todellakaan enää. pienenä oli pelottavaa olla yksin kotona illalla: sängyn alla saattoi olla mörköjä, peilissä näkyä kummituksia. en muuten vieläkään uskalla katsoa peileihin ollessani yksin pimeässä asunnossa. pahinta on tietysti, että itsensä pelottelu on niin helppoa kun tietää, mitä pelkää. no, nyt mulla on toinenkin henkilö, jonka puolesta pelätä. harald tuli tässä muutama päivä sitten kaksi tuntia tavallista myöhemmin töistä kotiin. ekaks koitin olla urhea ja järkevä: se on varmastikin joutunut jäämään pidemmäksi aikaa. sitä ei kestänyt kauan. olishan se soittanut. sitten: se on joutunu auto-onnettomuuteen (ikivihreä) tai sen mummolle tai äidille on tapahtunut jotain kamalaa (toimii myös hyvin). lopulta kaikista järkevin selitys tuntuu olevan se, että se ei tahdo tulla kotiin, koska se on hermostunu muhun. niinpä siis vietin kaksi tuntia pohtien näitä vaihtoehtoja. kun herra sitten suvaitsi palata (oli käynyt korjaamassa äitinsä nettiyhteyden ja lenkillä), olin jo täysi hermoraunio.
Montag, April 14, 2008
Dienstag, April 08, 2008
social week
I had a very social week last week. on wednesday harald's granny had birthday and so I went there right after my classes. well, actually I left in the middle of the portuguese lesson, as we were squeezed into a really small classroom where the air was just horrible after the first 45 minutes. anyway, I knew what was expecting me: a lot of food. luckily I was had missed the coffee (and cake, of course) and therefore I was still able to move after dinner (and cake, of course), unlike on easter.
on thursday clemens and rianna had invited me for dinner. it wasn't just a dinner (which was delicious, by the way, thanks clemens!) but also a game night. as you might know, I don't play, but I did play that evening.
the next evening I had my dancing class again. I felt slightly bad about myself for skipping the class after venice, especially as I had promised maria to go out for a drink after the class. this time maria didn't show up. after the class harald picked me up and we went to julia's birthday party. we were really lame guests, I must admit. we sat on the sofa nipping on our own wine and talking to no one. I mean, there were other seats around us, but everyone seemed to prefer standing. I can't change that. on our way home we stopped at mcdonald's and wasn't that great! I can't remember the last time I ate at mcdonald's. I'm not a big fan or anything, but after more than seven months (it's possible I ate at mdonald's in the summer) I needed some junk food. I suppose it's more psychological than anything else... ;-)
the saturday I spent in bratislava with paulina, stefanie, clemens and rianna. there are loads of pictures of that day on facebook. it was a very nice day, indeed. we were lucky with the weather, the food was good and cheap, and we also had a small adventure. visiting bratislava from vienna has been made very easy. the return train ticket costs 14€ (12€ with a vorteilscard) and it includes all public trasport in bratislava. we had a great lunch in the old town and the huge portion and a coke cost me about 7€. I also had an ice cream (one scoop about 30 cent). the journey takes about an hour by train. I'd say the day was well worth it. next week jaana is coming here and I'm taking her to bratislava, no matter what. in the evening I would have had another birthday party to go to, but as both harald and me were very tired, we decided to stay home.
on thursday clemens and rianna had invited me for dinner. it wasn't just a dinner (which was delicious, by the way, thanks clemens!) but also a game night. as you might know, I don't play, but I did play that evening.
the next evening I had my dancing class again. I felt slightly bad about myself for skipping the class after venice, especially as I had promised maria to go out for a drink after the class. this time maria didn't show up. after the class harald picked me up and we went to julia's birthday party. we were really lame guests, I must admit. we sat on the sofa nipping on our own wine and talking to no one. I mean, there were other seats around us, but everyone seemed to prefer standing. I can't change that. on our way home we stopped at mcdonald's and wasn't that great! I can't remember the last time I ate at mcdonald's. I'm not a big fan or anything, but after more than seven months (it's possible I ate at mdonald's in the summer) I needed some junk food. I suppose it's more psychological than anything else... ;-)
the saturday I spent in bratislava with paulina, stefanie, clemens and rianna. there are loads of pictures of that day on facebook. it was a very nice day, indeed. we were lucky with the weather, the food was good and cheap, and we also had a small adventure. visiting bratislava from vienna has been made very easy. the return train ticket costs 14€ (12€ with a vorteilscard) and it includes all public trasport in bratislava. we had a great lunch in the old town and the huge portion and a coke cost me about 7€. I also had an ice cream (one scoop about 30 cent). the journey takes about an hour by train. I'd say the day was well worth it. next week jaana is coming here and I'm taking her to bratislava, no matter what. in the evening I would have had another birthday party to go to, but as both harald and me were very tired, we decided to stay home.
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